Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Young Momma

My observations with my young motherhood:

1)      Energy: I can’t really speak for older moms but all I know is the difference in the amount of energy I have now compared to the amount of energy I had when I was 18 is pretty amazing.  And that’s only a few years.  I can and will be able to rough house on the floor, chase my babes in the backyard, crawl through the tunnel into the playhouse, run in the sprinkler, and hoist babies around on my person for a good long while.

2)      Time: We have a lot of time to grow our family to the size we want.  Time to re-evaluate our life plans and change accordingly.  We could space our kids 3 to 4 years apart or have stair step babies.  However God sees fit for the best way for our family to grow, we have the time to allow it to happen.  As long as we can responsibly and safely bring new additions into this world our options seem limitless.

3)      Youth: Yes, I have energy, but my body is also functioning very well.  I don’t have joint pain, arthritis, or high blood pressure.  (All of these traits run in my family, so I will do the best I can to avoid them, but I still know I have a great chance of it happening anyway).  I can be totally focused on my family and enjoying our time together without distraction.   Not to mention that I can only imagine how my body would have reacted to all the complications with my past pregnancy.  It has taken me a solid year to get most of complications in check, and I still have some recovering left to do; how would my body have handled that later in my life?

4)      Empty Nest: Technically, being a young mom could mean having lots of golden years to enjoy with your spouse once your kids have all flown the coop.  I say could because no one can ever foresee the future, I may have a kiddo that is more comfortable living with Mom and Dad.  This also could vary depending on when you stop adding little additions, obviously if you keep having babies later in life the longer they will be with you. (Which by the way is still beautiful!)

5)      Responsibility:  Contrary to what you may see on TV, to start a family is the most serious responsibility there is.  It is absolutely not a fad, and not something to take lightly.  Parenting is 24/7.  A lot of young parents stumble into the world of parenting and not all are equipped with the maturity it takes to raise a family.  When starting a family, whether by choice or otherwise, it needs love, dedication, devotion, maturity, faith, and the ability to prioritize; considering the needs of a family as a whole over the needs of self.

6)      Judgement: Unfortunately, there is a lot of stigma with being a young mom.  People assume I am unwed and uneducated.  Not true, Corey and I found out we were pregnant around our one year wedding anniversary and I attended a local community college.  Some people are just rude.  If you see a young woman carrying a baby with her, your first question should never be “are you married?”  People also assume that if you are a young parent you had to given up something: career, traveling, education, etc.  Umm, no.  Why should a child mean that your life is “over”?  Since becoming a wife and mother my life had just begun.  All I want to be the best mom I can be, you only get one chance at shaping your children’s lives.  I chose to be a stay at home mom and wife, that’s my dream and my goals are tied to it.  The beauty of our freedom to choose is that I can choose the path that leads to a life more fulfilled, you don’t have to agree with it, but I choose to be confident in it.

7)      Young Grandparents: If our kiddos decide to have children of their own, we will hopefully be younger and able to be present in their lives longer.  I have one living grandparent, I miss my Nana and Grandma terribly and I wish I could have had them present at my graduations, wedding, showers and birthdays.  I know that they are always with me, but I want my grandchildren to have more than stories and photos of us when they grow older.

8)      Relatable:  I guess I’m supposed to be cool and up with the latest and greatest.  I’m not.  I was just told what “planking” was and I’m still struggling with why the trend even started, as amusing as it may be.  But I do know the lingo, the peer pressure of youth, and the choices you face as a teen nowadays.  I’m not saying that parents older than myself aren’t relatable; it’s just that I’m not that far out of the game.  I hope to be able to have open dialogue with my teens and will be able to understand the world they will live in, but then again, there will always be Google.

Being a mom at any age is rewarding and fulfilling.  If motherhood is a journey you start in your teens or later in life, they joy that comes with it is just as unending.

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