Wednesday, January 2, 2013

35 weeks and Fightin' Mad: HG Diary Update

35 weeks

35 weeks

35 weeks
So we're reaching the end of the road.  I had my 35 week check up today and boy did I get bomb dropped on me today.

I have been completely open about my prenatal history:  I suffer from HG, SPD, and I always measure ahead.  I was induced with Isabelle because I was measuring over 40 weeks while actually being 38 weeks along and because my HG was so out of control they were afraid I would be too weak for labor.  We have a family history of large babies.  My mom, who at times in her life only weighed 100 pounds soaking wet, managed to birth 10 pound 24 inch babies.

ALL of this I have told over and over to ALL of the 6 midwives within the practice.  And yet....

I go in for my prenatal appointment and I'm measuring full term (40 weeks) at 35 weeks.  Now, this didn't give me a single moments pause, I'm just thinking this is par for the course.  After my midwife announces my measurements I quickly scan her face and can read her mind.  Her next statement was: "You're 35 weeks, but you're large enough and far enough along that if you went into labor we wouldn't be alarmed."

Ugh.  Deja vu.  I know where this is headed.

"Well, next week we'll schedule an ultrasound, checking for positioning of the baby and just to be doubly sure that there is only one little girl in there.  Has anyone spoken with you about getting the estimate for her weight yet?"

"No, but what purpose would knowing how much she weighs have?  I don't want an induction."

"Well, that's exactly it.  We have a policy that if during an ultrasound it is estimated that you are going to have a large baby, a baby over a certain number of grams, that you would be categorized as a "category 2" patient and we would transfer your care to the OB side of the practice."

I knew this was going to happen.  This is why I objected to the original suggestion of an ultrasound.  I just knew it.  The midwives can schedule inductions so with the transfer to an OB I know that it's very very likely they will push for a c-section. 

But she's healthy!  Thriving!  I am completely comfortable with birthing a large baby, why are my care providers worried?  I haven't hidden my knowledge of the fact we make large babies, why is this policy just now coming to light?  Why now, in the final weeks?  I had considered switching to a new midwife after the whole kidney infection/kidney stone mess up but decided to stay because:
  1. They have handled my HG so well.  Because of aggressive preventative measures I know it's the reason why I'm as healthy as I am (or can be for a HG sufferer) during this pregnancy.
  2. I was right on the cusp of the 3rd trimester, I was afraid I wouldn't have enough time to bond and make my preferences known with a new midwife.
  3. We had already paid in full for the services of these midwives.  The only bill we would have after the arrival of Fiona would be the hospital bill, for using their facility.  (Independent midwives are very expensive, $3500 upfront expensive).
Had I known about this policy- it would have been my red flag warning, letting me know to jump ship.  But now, here I am, mere weeks away from delivery and I find out I may end up with a new provider, whom I have never met, and I wouldn't have any say in the choosing.  I can feel my grip on an un-medicated natural birth slipping right out of reach.

Livid.

Furthermore, my midwife continues in the conversation to recommend that I start taking Primrose Oil and another Natural Birth formula to try and kick start my labor myself.  At 35 weeks, and without any actual data to estimate that the baby is truly large, I find this advice borderline reckless.  Needless to say I won't be doing any of these things.

My blood pressure is great, I do not have gestational diabetes, I'm not suffering from any swelling.  Her heart rate is fabulous and she is active and happily squirming in my belly.  We are positive of her conception date, for reasons I'm not quite prepared to discuss here.  I can feel exactly where this appointment is headed and at this point I begin begging/haggling:

"Since we know she's healthy and everything looks OK,  can we just check for positioning and multiples?  I would prefer not to know how big she is going to be."

"I knew that this would give you some anxiety.  I'll tell you what, I'll not order the weight scan and it'll buy you another week.  But, you need to be prepared for this subject to come up again with another midwife."

I'm thinking: oh, well golly, thanks for "buying" me another week.  Seriously?

So after discussing things with Corey here is our new game plan:
  • Go through with the ultrasound, checking for multiples and positioning.
  • After the ultrasound we have an appointment with another midwife.  Who will most likely bring up that we need to get a weight estimate.  We will then decline the estimate ultrasound.
  • If our declining of the ultrasound is met with hesitation on the midwife's behalf, we have decided that although the norm during this stage of pregnancy is a prenatal appointment every week, I will only be making myself available every other week.  This should buy us at least another 4 weeks.
I know every day is precious, especially when we are speaking in terms of developmental growth of an unborn baby.  I'm asking for prayers friends, lots of prayers on behalf of Fiona.  Please help us bring her here in the safest way possible.  And please wish us luck next Friday as we have our ultrasound.  I am a firm believer in babies choosing their own birthdays, as long as it's safe and healthy.  It's something that was taken from Isabelle and a choice (after learning the hard way) that I will fight for Fiona to have.

5 comments:

  1. I cannot believe they are doing this to you. I was really hoping you'd have better luck this go around :(

    It makes me sad that they are really trying to push you!! UGH. I hope your plan works and that little girl stays put until SHE is ready!!

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    1. Jessica, I'd be lying if I said the way this situation has turned out isn't giving me anxiety. I'm trying not to focus on what I may be pushed into doing and trying not to regret not finding a new midwife back when my "gut" told me to. The other taxing part is that we are planning on this being our last baby, I was so hoping that things would run more smoothly and I'd be able to have a birthing experience that I was happy with. All of that aside, the most important thing is Fiona is healthy and happy of course, and right now, birthing experience my way or not, that's what we're fighting for. Please keep us in your prayers <3

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  2. Found this through the crunchy convert. I had HG. I also had to go into the hospital when after trying to labor at home when it kept stalling due to my HG-induced, terrifying Gall bladder attacks. I did not get my ideal home birth and because of the GB attacks and all of the stalling, I had to be induced. I had a vaginal birth that I consider a success but the induction meant that the baby flew out of me, tearing me to shreds and 3 years later I am still dealing with vaginal and rectal issues. Birthing a gigantic baby would have caused less damage. I had a small baby that they thought would be 1.5 pounds smaller and almost every baby I know was grossly underestimated or over-estimated. I truly believe from all of my reading that even if you think you will have a big baby, the benefits of waiting for labor to begin its own far outweigh the risk of a big baby causing issues. You're at the hospital with midwives? You do not have to in until you are in labor. You have the right not to be induced. You have a right to the birth you want. You have a right to get that ultrasound and go home and not show up to answer to anyone until you were in labor. My very best!!!

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    Replies
    1. Thank you for sharing! Our plan is to stay as politely absent as possible and not get to the hospital until transition. I pre-register on Tuesday so showing up close to pushing shouldn't be too much of a hassle. All of this fabulous support and women sharing their stories is definitely helping to boost my confidence!

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  3. Where are you giving birth? I'm so sorry! Not the support you would expect from a team of midwives! Ugh, I am livid with you! Stick to your guns momma! Only you and your family know what is best for Fiona :) So long as you are healthy, stay strong! I was told I was probably going to have a very tiny baby and Isabell was born at exactly 7 lb 21 in long. Everyone expected me to be deathly ill during labor because I remained HG throughout my entire pregnancy, and I only got sick once when my water broke. Everyone thought that I was going to have to transfer. They said I had a 90% chance of transfer for emergency c-section and I ignored it, all of it. What happened? Just minutes later I gave birth. Life is full of surprises, stay confident and true to yourself and all will layout like it ought to!

    Please note: My birthing team was INCREDIBLE! I adored my midwives and doulas, but regardless of how much I trusted and loved and respected their professional opinion....Only Isabell and I really knew what was going on inside of my body.

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